Death Collector?!?!?

So I finally had Joey clean out his gross backpack. He unzipped his front pocket to unearth this book. I said, "WTF, why do you have a book called The DEATH collector!?!" He said, I don't know, I got it from Santa when he came to our school before Christmas break."

Say it ain't so, Santa. Say it ain't so!!!!

Flowers and Cheez Doodles

As I am sitting here eating cheez doodles I am thinking about all of the things in life that I want to do and how many things hold me back from doing them. There's 2. Just 2 things, money and my weight. The sad thing is it's not so much the money as it is the weight. I can afford to go to an amusement park but my fat ass doesn't fit on the rides. I can afford to play sports but my fat ass doesn't move fast enough. I can afford to play with my kids... that is free, BUT my fat ass won't let me run, hike, jump, chase, bend over, bend down, kneel, sit on the ground, fit in a swing, fit on a slide, fit through the tunnels, roll around, etc.

I need to get my shit together. If anyone out there can get my ass in gear then PLEASE help me!

I planted a garden on Mother's day and some flowers today. Hopefully we will have tomatoes, squash, cucumbers, and hot peppers in a few short weeks.

Baby fever

You know that you really want another kid when you see the "Rosemary's Baby" commercial and think...... "Well how bad could it really be..." 

I wish my last pregnancy wasn't so scary. I wish I could lose weight, for real. I wish we had more money. I wish I could just focus on one dream at a time and stop trying to live 10 lives at once. I just want to experience life. As much as possible. I need to stop eating garbage again and lose this weight. Nothing I do now will hide what I really want to do.

I want to roller skate. 

I want to FIT in a swing.

I want my kids to be able to fit their arms around me when they hug me. 

I want to live.

I want to live. 

Why can't I get my shit together? Why does food have so much power over me???? 

Therapy tomorrow. I need to get to the bottom of this.